August 24, 2017

THE SOUTHERN DAILY



THE SOUTHERN DAILY

Police arrest prophet for r_ape

Limpopo police have arrested a 32-year-old self-proclaimed prophet outside Tzaneen for allegedly r_aping four girls between the ages of 12 and 16. Limpopo police spokesperson Lieutenant Colonel Moatshe Ngoepe said the SAPS Family Violence and Child Protection Unit and the Sexual Offences Unit from Tzaneen carried out the arrest. “Allegations are that this pastor r_aped […]

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Somizi sending underprivileged kids to university

Local entertainer Somizi Mhlongo will use a percentage from his book sales to pay for underprivileged students to go to university. “With my book approaching almost 10 000 units – and thanks to you – I spoke to my management and I want to donate R20 from each book and I want to help two […]

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Pastor can’t get it up

A PASTOR from Mangaung claims God is punishing him for his sins. The 48-year-old man from Phase 2 kasi says he has slept with 21 women in his church and now his manhood won’t get up. He believes God wants him to change his ways and stop poking his congregation. The holy man is appealing […]

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Durban man tired of cannibalism

A man found in possession of human parts allegedly told Escourt cops he was “tired of eating human flesh”. Escort Cops spokesperson Colonel Thembeka Mbhele said the suspect walked into the Estcourt cop shop on Friday night and confessed to the cops on duty. “When he was questioned, he produced part of a human leg […]

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Teacher in trouble for talking about s_ex instead of teaching maths

Students got angry and took action against their maths teacher for talking about sex in class instead of teaching them. So clever pupils from Topaz Secondary School in Lenasia, Joburg started filming him. Last week, they showed the evidence to their parents, who were furious. One parent said she started worrying when she saw her […]

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3 patients try to burn down hospital over booze

THREE patients were allegedly bust with booze at Sizwe Tropical Diseases Hospital in Edenvale, Ekurhuleni on Saturday. They were found by a nurse, who immediately called the guards. Security guards confiscated the booze. This drove the patients nuts! They went on the rampage inside the hospital, trashing everything they could lay their hands on. They […]

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Crime is good for economy, creates more jobs – says Minister of Police

Commenting on the increasing rate of crime and hijackings in South Africa, Minister of police Fikile Mbalula said on Saturday morning that though the rate of crime is worsening, it is on the other hand good for the economy and society. “Just imagine if we didn’t have criminals, we wouldn’t need police officers and security […]

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Child dies in hospital while nurses watch video on cellphone

When his daughter Hlengiwe Thubana started having labour pains on Friday night, she was rushed to KwaMhlanga Hospital’s maternity ward. But instead of admitting her, the nurses were allegedly watching a video on a cellphone and referred her to KwaMhlanga Clinic. At the clinic, Hlengiwe was referred back to the hospital as she was a […]

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Zimbabwe Prophet claims he beat up God in a heaven wrestling match, wins using Batista bomb

Harare – A local controversial prophet from Zimbabwe has made sensational claims that he fought and defeated God in a heaven sanctioned wrestling match. Prophet T Madungwe’s flyer stating the absurd claims has since gone viral on social media, attracting thousands of shares. Speaking to a local reporter, the prophet said he was going around heaven […]

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Somizi to release braille version of his book

Somizi is set to introduce his hit memoir Dominoes: Unbreakable Spirit to a new audience after apparently striking a deal to release the book in braille. He announced the news on his Metro FM breakfast show with DJ Fresh this week, explaining that the idea came from meeting a blind listener who regularly contributed to […]

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